Sharing life's lessons.

Posts tagged ‘self worth’

Ever Changing Self-worth

I picked up a new book today called Wishes Fufilled by Dr. Wayne Dyer. I am only on chapter 3 so I have yet to decide my final opinion of the book, but I do have to say, so far what I have read has had a profound effect on me. In chapter 2 he talks about Who Am I? I am going to speak about the part that was most profound to me.

There is a few paragraphs that talk about your body and how it is ever changing. The body you were born with is not the same body you have now. You have had many bodies. A baby body, toddler body, teen body etc. Even the body you have now is always changing. Some cells die, and new cells are made. The book goes on to discuss other aspects of your body and yourself, but the profound part for me, was realizing that all my life I have defined my self-worth by things that are always changing, or by things that could be changed in an instance and I have no control over it. Lets say, for example, that you find self-worth because you think you have a beautiful body. It should be noted that feeling good about your body is most certainly a good thing, but if that is the only way you find self-worth, what will you do when your body changes? Maybe you get pregnant and have kids, or maybe you get into a car accident and get terribly scarred. Your body changes. Lets say you find your self-worth in your job…… what do you do if you get fired or laid off?

For me, the ah-ha! moment was realizing that I put all my self-worth into things that always change. No wonder why I could never keep up. Having to re-adapt my sense of self-worth every day is a tiring process! From now on, I plan to find my self-worth in things that are more stable, and within my control. I get to choose if I am kind or not. I get to choose if I am considerate or responsible. How I behave and the way I treat others, is my choice. I encourage you all to search for your sense of self-worth inside of yourselves too.

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Discoveries of Yourself

Recently I started playing role playing games with my best friend again. One of my most favourite characters to play is named Aurianna. To me she is the person who has it all. I would love to be her. Then I came to the realization that I created her. Everything I put in her, I must have inside me, or I wouldn’t have understood those characteristics to put in her. I think a lot of people don’t realize the gifts they have inside them.

Think of someone you know, whose opinion you value, or someone you look up to. Ask yourself what about them is it that you admire so much (I am referring to personality characteristics). Are they smart, brave, strong, balanced…….make a list. Now….. give yourself a pat on the back! All those things you just listed about them, you have inside of you. If you didn’t, you would not have been able to recognize those characteristics inside of them.

Now comes the hard part. If you think that person is confident, for example, but you don’t think you are, then you need to ask yourself why? You now know there is confidence inside of you, but why can’t you access that feeling? Maybe someone told you that you were fat, or stupid, or unworthy. For me, my confidence was low for along time because I looked to others to make me feel that way, and for the most part they just made me feel unworthy and useless. I know my confidence is down there, so now I need to dig. You need to dig too. You need to get rid of all that junk (self doubt, unworthiness, etc) that is burying your confidence. I am not a counselor, I can’t tell you how to work through those negative emotions, but I hope at least now, you have a place to start.