Recently I started playing role playing games with my best friend again. One of my most favourite characters to play is named Aurianna. To me she is the person who has it all. I would love to be her. Then I came to the realization that I created her. Everything I put in her, I must have inside me, or I wouldn’t have understood those characteristics to put in her. I think a lot of people don’t realize the gifts they have inside them.
Think of someone you know, whose opinion you value, or someone you look up to. Ask yourself what about them is it that you admire so much (I am referring to personality characteristics). Are they smart, brave, strong, balanced…….make a list. Now….. give yourself a pat on the back! All those things you just listed about them, you have inside of you. If you didn’t, you would not have been able to recognize those characteristics inside of them.
Now comes the hard part. If you think that person is confident, for example, but you don’t think you are, then you need to ask yourself why? You now know there is confidence inside of you, but why can’t you access that feeling? Maybe someone told you that you were fat, or stupid, or unworthy. For me, my confidence was low for along time because I looked to others to make me feel that way, and for the most part they just made me feel unworthy and useless. I know my confidence is down there, so now I need to dig. You need to dig too. You need to get rid of all that junk (self doubt, unworthiness, etc) that is burying your confidence. I am not a counselor, I can’t tell you how to work through those negative emotions, but I hope at least now, you have a place to start.